It's all about the shoes

I feel like fashion this fall has just been ok. I've only bought one thing that I was craving - this cute little sweater jacket from The Limited. But while fashion disappoints - shoes almost never do... These are ones on my Christmas wish list. All shoes from http://www.ninewest.com/.



I really want grey ankle boots. I'm not sure why but they're just soo cute. These aren't the exact pair I saw at DSW but close enough.



I saw a girl at a wedding wearing similar shoes... I think hers were from Nina (I've seen them before). But these are on sale and still super cute. They scream garden party.



I have enough solid black shoes for now so I'm gradually adding fun shoes to my wardrobe. Fun includes anything multi-colored (which is surprisingly wearable!). I'm also drooling over a pair of bright blue Steve Madden's (will post another day).




Falling safely in the who needs practical shoes category these are on my wish list. I want them so badly the only thing stopping me from driving to Macy's right now is that they're closed. There's something so little girl fabulous about all the sparkles. And I think the shoe could be surprisingly day wearable if you pair it with toned down black pants and top. I would wear these to work and dare anyone to say anything about them. Sooo cute!



My Favorite Thing: Fall Fashion

I hate to see summer end. Sure it's about a hundred degrees in the shade but summer is by far my favorite season. The beach, more things to do, the bright colors, the white manis, sandals, flip flops, white pants, easy make-up... My second favorite season though would be when the seasons change. There's just something so great about all these fabulous new clothes hitting the stores. I pour over the quarterly fashion mags to see what's "in" for Fall, Winter, Spring, Summer... you name it. So with fall teasing us with cool mornings my favorite thing of the moment is all this fab fall fashion hitting the stores.

Here are a few of my favorites - let me know what you think.

Can I talk about how much I love this cardi/jacket? It's so Jackie O/Chanel/Audrey... I tried it on probably three times before I just gave up and bought it. And that's huge for me because my rule is don't buy it full price when you can wait for a fab sale. And of course it's from where else but The Limited.

Super cute tweed skirt from The Limited. I haven't bought it yet but don't think I haven't been eyeing this up as the perfect companion to the jacket above.

I love this lace skirt from The Limited. I'm trying to be good and wait for it to go on sale but every ounce of self control I have is forcing me not to run out to the store right this second and snatch it right up.

I've really gotten more into Ann Taylor Loft recently. I've snapped up a few good purchases at the end of summer sales and spent some time scoping out what I want when the sales start to hit. Here are a few finds...

This outfit is so super cute. I love the hat. The skirt, the jacket, everything. I want it.

How cute is this whole look? I'm loving her hat, the skinny jeans and the tweed jacket. The boots - not so much but you can't win them all. Target had a similar hat to both of these in a commercial for probably half the costs so I make snap that up just in case I find I'm not much of a hat girl.

One thing I'm loving about Ann Taylor and Loft is they carry petites which is huge if you're like me and barely 5'4. I hate having to get clothes hemmed. It costs even more money and is just a huge pain in the neck. If I can buy pants that are the perfect fit - amazing! (I will say my only problem is there are times when it's close - I'm not quite a regular but not quite a petite - nothing screams lame like high water pants that aren't intentional).

Ok this is it for now - I think I hear a netflix and glass of wine calling my name. I'll try to post more later of some more favs for fall - Ann Taylor (Loft's more expensive older sister) has some fab skirts and dresses and of course my jean favorite Old Navy has some really great skinny jeans for cheap. What are you shopping for this season?

I have a secret...

I started a new blog. I'm officially cheating on this blog.

The thing is - I read this story on CNN a few months ago that basically said you couldn't have a blog about everything. It just wouldn't work. (That was a bit of a downer). So I got it into my head - I could have a new blog. A blog about growing up or maybe it's just getting older...

So here it is: http://secretsofarealgirl.blogspot.com/

Check it out - follow if you like - and let me know what you think. I'm still going to post to this one because now I can officially have my cake and eat it too....

Travel

I have to travel for work. Weird things always happen when I travel. I seem to have a sign that says "strangers please talk to me". I'm not saying I'm opposed to a little friendly banter on a plane ride. I'm just opposed to it going any deeper than what to do you, what are you reading, etc.

For example:

1. On a train ride to NJ - my seatmate told me he was a fighter with an HBO fight coming up. I had a sneaking suspicion that he might have been hitting on me. Unfortunately, he followed up the conversation with the fact that he had eight children. Not that I was interested to begin with but deal breaker. Besides which afterwards, K and his brother tried to find him on HBO and couldn't.

2. On my recent plane trip. This lady comes up to me as we're boarding and says I look familiar and was I from Montana. I said no and she walked away. My seatmate and I chatted a bit during the flight (normal conversation that you'd have with someone you don't know). The plane stopped at one stop before my stop and he got up and left. The woman who had come up to me when we were boarding sits next to me and says "I've been wanting to talk to you all flight." Red flag. She then proceeds to blabber about how I look like her neighbor or something and how she's traveling on vacation to WV (ok...) then to see her son and that gangs are after her - wait... what?? Yes, she's in a bit of a rough spot but don't worry she has a restraining order out. And by the way did I think my seatmate was legit? She thought he stared at her funny in the airport then looked away scared and she thought he might be in a gang. Really?

3. This one couple on another plane ride. I thought the woman was travelling with her father (so sweet). She slept most of the flight and he talked my ear off. Then right before we land - the two of them start making out hardcore. Gross.

That's all I can think about right now. But I have a lot of time tonight so who knows... Does this stuff ever happen to you?

To Greige Or Not To Greige...

As far as beauty treatments go, nail polish is one of those things I like but don't spend a lot of time on. I'm not much of a mani/pedi girl (talk to a dermatologist for five minutes and you'll swear off them for life), I can't keep my nails from chipping past a day or two, and I just don't like the hassle or base coat/top coat/polish/polish remover. I'm tired just thinking about it. But I like how polish looks - especially all those cool trendy colors. It's like this quick and cheap little statement about yourself - like hello I know what's cool and it's this $7 bottle of color.

So I've been reading a lot about greige polish. Funny name for basically a grey/beige combo. It sounded kinda perfect since grey has been what I've secretly been wanting to paint my bathroom forever (that or lime green - big difference). But grey sounded like a hard color to wear - you don't exactly want to look dead. But then I saw an article that said if it had a pink tone to it - you'd nix all that pale vampire look and get a pretty complimentary color to your skin tone. Worth checking out if I do say so myself.

While at Target picking out a wedding gift I swung by the nail polish aisle and scooped up It's Possible be Nicole for OPI. OPI is by far my fav but I don't have time to swing by Trade Secret every time I need polish and Nicole works just as well. So I tried it out. After a few mishaps (I was trying to get dressed and do my hair for the wedding and paint my nails) I had a pretty perfect set of polished fingers.

The color? A pinky grey/brown with just the right amount of shimmer.

The verdict? I don't think I look as tan as when I wear white polish and it's not as summery as my bright pinks and corals... but it's a pretty color and much more work appropriate then my bright blue nails of a few weeks ago. I would say it's actually the perfect trendy color for a job interview. It looks professional enough you can skate by without calling attention to bright purple tips.

What do you think? (I'll try to post a photo when I can).

Update

So obviously I'm not good at weekly resolutions anymore than a yearly one. And maybe that just proves that people can't follow a resolution for a year. Sure you start it with good intentions but halfway through you're just bored. The sad thing is I have a list of 52 I made up at the beginning of the year but it's on my old computer and it's too much of a pain to switch back and forth between the two... the old one is unplugged and not connected so it takes forever. I've just felt busy too. Which can be a good thing.

But I'm going to be better about posting - that is my latest resolution and maybe my last. If I get back to the weekly ones I'll back track for all the weeks I missed. Until then though... have fun making your own resolutions and let me know how you're doing.

Week 28 and 29 of the 52 Week Challenge

So I've been a bit MIA recently but I was on vacay for a week in lovely NJ. And you can say what you will but NJ is very nice and I had a fab time (thanks for asking). So I just got home and want to post something so here we go:

Week 28 - read something for fun - you read the hard book so now read something you want to read. I'm going to read Chelsea Handler's book which I've had forever and keep putting off in favor of library books.

Week 29 - this relates to my last post about starting a new blog - I'm pretty much sure I'm going to start one - I just need to finalize my name and tell everyone. But the main reason is I'm going to use it to talk about things that I don't talk about here... more on that later when I intro it. But this all got me thinking about a Cosmo article I read on the ride home - it was all about moving forward with your life. You can't sit back and hope things are going to happen - you have to take steps to make things happen. And the first step was keep a running list of things you like or things that make you happy. You keep the list for a week then look for a commonality. Maybe you like things that are creative, or you like math (haha that won't make my list but maybe if you secretly dream of being an accountant...), or you like taking photos... I don't know. So I'm going to keep a list and see where that takes me.

I don't expect to move forward tomorrow or next week even but it has been playing in my thoughts a lot recently about where I see myself in five years, ten years, etc. And yes, part of me sees myself sipping cocktails on a Caribbean island somewhere (rich and carefree) but the realistic part of me is striving for the next best thing (a successful career and home somewhere near a beach in the US). So I know part of my list will be researching beach-front living on the east coast and see where that takes me. Where do you think your likes would take you? Let me know what you come up with.

Week 26 and 27 of the 52 Week Challenge

Hello All! Sorry for the delay but just forgot about this and I'm debating starting a new blog... more on that later.

So week 26 - read a classic. I picked Lady Chatterley's Lover. I've never read it before and they had it on a shelf when I first came in the library. So far it's ok. Not nearly as boring as I expected but not as racy as anything today either. I also have a Tree Grows in Brooklyn (I think that's the name). I haven't started that one yet but I've always heard about it... so we'll see.

Week 27 - I'm hoping to get the beach again sometime this summer. And as luck would have it - I do have to go for work in a few weeks. So this week - I'm all about my new medicine ball and this ab video I have... so I'm going to make my resolution the week to do my ab workout at least once a day. K says I have to do at least 100 a day to see any kind of results. So here's to a flat stomach in a few weeks!

Week 25 of the 52 Week Challenge

This one is more for me but feel free to tweak to make it work for you. I have a few writing contest coming up that I want to enter and I need to make myself get motivated and buckle down. Procrastination may be an art I've mastered but there comes a time when a girl has to get serious. So this week my challenge is to write ten minutes a day. Ten minutes! That's cutting out blow drying my hair every morning or not checking my email or having a twenty minute lunch - I can do this!

The thing is you can do this too. If writing isn't your thing - try something else. Work out, go for a walk, sing, paint, whatever... rekindle a passion you had for whatever hobby you want. Ten minutes isn't much a commitment and that's the entire point. I think if you sit down and say I'm working on this for three hours you probably won't even try. You'll think to yourself - three hours - I don't have three hours - I need to clean my house, meet friends, cook dinner, etc. Three hours is ridiculous. But if you say ten minutes completely to yourself. You can shut the door with confidence and stay in there ten minutes of three hours (if you get caught up). So good luck!

Excuse me are you pregnant?

Remember a while back we talked about annoying things people say... well one of them is "Are you pregnant?" Let me start by saying unless someone was about to drop a baby on my foot I don't think I'd straight up ask them. What if they said, "No I'm a bit bloated today." or "I swallowed a basketball for breakfast."? Embarrassing.

So today, I wore a cute sundress to work - bright purple and white and empire waist. I love empire waist stuff - one it highlights most women's skinniest part of their waist - right under their breast - two it highlights your breast in a non-sleazy way (I'm sure there are sleazy ways but....) - and three they are so comfy!! No need to worry about eating light with these babies on.

I walk down to the cafeteria because as usual I'm running late and didn't have two minutes to heat oatmeal and ordered a sandwich. And this really nice lady who I see everyday (hence you should realize that I wasn't looking pregnant Monday) asks, "are you pregnant?"

Augh! Really? I'll admit I'm no Kate Moss in the skinny department but I'm not walking around with a basketball up my skirt either. So embarrassing for both of us. Of course I said no. Then she played it off that I've been married for awhile and I'll be pregnant soon if not today. Wow... there goes me wanting to scarf down a breakfast sandwich. I'll just have a skim milk and cereal. Starvation diet here I come.

The funny thing is though - empire waist dresses are everywhere!! (Maybe because they are so darn comfortable/flattering).

Here are a few of my favorites:

All images are from: www.anntaylor.com and www.anntaylorloft.com.

Book Review: The Swan Thieves: A Novel - by Elizabeth Kostova

So I picked up this book because I saw it in a magazine and then it was on the past best-sellers cart at the library. I had doubts because I read Kostova's last book The Historian and thought it was just ok. Ok meaning - slightly boring at times and a bit too long - and I don't really remember it. A good book I can remember. A bad book I can remember. An ok book just sits there in no where land and every now and then I'll be like did I like that or not and the answer is usually not so much. Still I took The Swan Thieves home and started reading because it was on a 2 week loan and the book is long!

The story flip flops between a few characters: Marlow, Mary, Kate and Beatrice (who lives in the late 1800's) and revolves around Marlow trying to figure out why a painter Robert Oliver went crazy on a photo called Leda and tried to stab it. Mary and Kate are his ex-lover and wife respectively and Beatrice is a painter who Oliver is obsessed with. Following me still?

First - the mystery is pretty easy to guess. Kostova gives a pretty big clue in the beginning of the story and Beatrice pretty much confirms it as she goes along.

Second - the story is long and kind of boring (hence why I didn't like The Historian). The book could have been shortened by a good 150 pages at least. Kate and Mary's parts aren't that interesting - they just highlight how Oliver went off the deep end and half of what they say could be summed up - do we really care how they met and the painting classes Mary takes (I didn't). I found myself actually skimming over their parts and the endless descriptions of useless stuff. For example, Marlow visits some painter in Acapulco and Kostova spends forever describing the hotel, the area, the painter's house... skim, skim, and more skimming.

I'm only hoping no one in book club picks either of her books and I'm stuck rereading them because I can guarantee I'm going to read Amazon reviews and random websites for a summary. Three out of five stars at best - I'm actually more inclined to say two but I don't want to be too mean. The story is actually interesting and the mystery if you don't pay attention or maybe with fewer clues is a good one - I just think it could have been better done and in a shorter manner.

Week 24 of the 52 Week Challenge

So I know late again. I promise to be better. I just need to de-stress first. This week - try something new. I've already got my new thing planned. I'm going white water rafting on Saturday. How fun, right? So I'll let you guys know how it goes. I really want to take a camera but a. don't want shots of me in a bikini unless I photoshop my head on Jennifer Aniston's body and b. I don't want to damage my camera. I'm thinking I might get a disposable water camera - if I do I'll post those - minus the bikini shots of course!

And speaking of cameras for my birthday gift to myself I got a new camera (yay). I've been wanting one forever and had my eye on two Nikon's. I did all the research and I got... a Nikon I didn't research. The deal was great though - it does everything the camera I wanted does except the zoom is 7 instead of 10. But the camera came with a case and a memory card. It's so much smaller than my last camera and takes amazing photos. I'll try to take a few to post soon. But if I was doing a favorites post today - my favorite thing would be Nikon. I've had two digital cameras and one film camera from them and they all still work perfectly (ok one digital camera is like three days old so I hope it still works)! I've never had a problem with any of them. I was actually wishing my digital would die so I could have a reason to buy a new one!!!

Week 23 of the 52 Week Challenge

I know late but I have a valid excuse this time... personal stuff I'm not getting into on her. lol.... Anyway, I have a great idea for a week but again I have to save it because I just don't have the time or energy this week. Sooooo frivolous and easy it is. I don't know about you but I am a magazine junky. I'm probably who magazine people want in focus groups. I will subscribe to magazines like they are candy. Those puppies aren't cheap. I currently have 4 subscriptions going - although one was free and ending so I'm on the prowl for a new magazine (I'm debating between Shape and Self - thoughts anyone???).

So with all these magazines lying around I got to thinking how often I actually try something other than a recipe in them. And came up with the challenge this week.... drum roll please. Find a magazine and try one suggestion they have - whether it be a recipe, a friend date, a sex tip, a make-up tip, a hobby idea, I don't care... you can pick whatever you want.

I've already nailed a few options. Glamour (my current magazine of choice - I'm only hoping one day they'll read this and see what a brilliant guest columnist I'd be and that they should give me free mags for life) - had how to do an easy messy updo and since my pin-straight hair is usually down - I gave it a whirl on Saturday. I haven't worn it out yet because I feel a bit like a ballerina but it was super easy and I loved it for summer. Basically it's a bun - what did you think I'm going to actually curl and pin it into something elaborate??? And I also tried the "it" nail color of turquoise - I do have to work so it's on my toes and I'm not sure I love it as much as my go to dark purple in the winter but it's a cute unexpected alternative to white. On the nail polish note - I swear I think these mags have a deal with OPI because the "it" color changes more frequently then change socks. It's green, it's yellow, its grey, its purple... hows a girl to keep up.

One thing I'm not trying? Cosmo (a magazine I'm debating dropping) suggested that a hot make-up tip for summer was different color lips, red on bottom, pink on top or some other combination. If the model can't pull it off - I know I can't. Seriously whoever thought that up was ridiculous. It's def. a runway thing that cannot be pulled off in real life. She looked ridiculous.

So let me know what you try. I think this one could be fun.

Book Review: The House at Riverton

So for Book Club we read The Forgotten Garden by Kate Morton. The book was ok - I thought it dragged a bit but overall interesting. The funny thing about book club is some books I come in thinking good book and leave the meeting thinking not so great book. That's how I ended up feeling about The Forgotten Garden. There were some flaws that other members pointed out that I hadn't thought much about before.

Anyway - I read Kate Morton's other book The House at Riverton after the meeting.

First off - The House at Riverton and The Forgotten Garden are pretty much the same book - family mystery, bad mothers, flashbacks to tell the story, something shocking happening, etc. The endings on both are both pretty easy to figure out although The House at Riverton you are left guessing until the end exactly who does what to whom. This is disappointing to me. I know most writers have a style but it just reinforces my belief in not reading multiple books by the same author.

That being said The House at Riverton isn't a bad book. I actually liked it better than The Forgotten Garden. The story follows Grace, a 98 year old woman remembering her time at Riverton where she meets the daughters of the master of the house - Emmaline and Hannah. I can't tell too much about the story without giving the entire thing away. The story takes place both when Grace is in her late 90's about to die and when she's a servant at Riverton and later for Hannah. The mystery you find out pretty early on is that Robbie (a poet) presumably kills himself during a party Hannah and her husband are hosting at Riverton... but what really happened?? Cue dramatic music.

Another mystery (which is very similar to The Forgotten Garden) follows who is Grace's father. The reader can probably figure out after the first couple of chapters but it's not really the main point of the book and Grace figures it out much later (she seems a bit naive).

The problem is Hannah and Emmaline aren't likable. Grace is ok as a character but her younger self is naive and does some pretty dumb things because she's in "the service" to the family. The book would be better if you cared about the characters instead of wondering why they were doing something.

Apparently some of the Amazon reviewers are up in arms over the fact that Morton uses a cuss word in the book - I say BFD - get over it prudes. It's not like the characters are dropping curses left and right or there's endless sex scenes. It's only ever implied that characters are having sex (which is pretty hard to do since I'm fairly certain Emmaline was in some sort of early porn flick). People need to start worrying about more important things other than whether there are curse words in a book.

Overall, the book is good. Maybe three out of five stars. I wouldn't reread it. The story is entertaining and moves fairly quickly - although there are parts you want to just skim over (mainly Grace in present day). The mystery although a who-dun-it isn't like normal mysteries of today with intrigue and spies and lots of fighting scenes. At it's heart the book is a family drama with a bit of a mystery.

My Favorite Things: Under Armour

I haven't done a Favorite Things post in forever mainly because I couldn't think of anything good enough that I wanted to talk about. But I got home early and was changing for kickball (I signed up for an adult league this summer)... and I got out my new Under Armour workout clothes and it hit me. I love love my Under Armour workout clothes - they are super comfy and totally worth the splurge but what I love best is my sports bra from them. Glamorous - I know... but hey sometimes function over glamour. Anyway - here's what I love: Sports bra are usually the most unsexy underwear you can own (aside from armpit high granny panties), they give you either no boobs or uniboobs (where you have one big squished looking boob - sorry boys!) - the Under Armour bra while not sexy (I mean can a sports bra be sexy??) it certainly still gives you curves while also giving support. There are actual built in cups to keep the girls lifted and separate while the sports bra part keeps them tightly in place -haha I can't think of a better way to say this. So the bra??? I can't find a name on my tag it just says Women Heatgear... the website (after my computer - augh!!) finally pulled up the page (stupid internet not available message) says its called Strength. Here's the link. I think you'll love it!!!

Week 22 of the 52 Week Challenge

This week is one I've been toying with for awhile. For a couple of reasons 1. budget and 2. time. But I'm going to go with it and say "plan a weekend road trip". Reading it you don't even have to go - I could plan a trip and decide later never to actually leave so it's perfect - budgets remain in tact. But I will say planning this takes like little to no effort. K and I took a random Thursday off last week and went to the beach for the day. Costs minimal. Planning next to none.

Also this will get me to look into a surprise for K's bday. I really want to take him somewhere - hopefully some friends can tag along too. Anyone have good ideas? I'm thinking if we drive a nice skiing trip (early December so early in the season) - maybe rent a cabin, get a ski pass, go to a winery (are they open that time of year??). If we fly then I want somewhere nice and warm where I have no worries except where to go for dinner, whose making margaritas and how long to lay on the beach. Both sound delightful in their own way.

And if I can't make it work - I do want to plan a trip with friends for next summer. I feel like we're slowly creeping our way into adulthood (ok maybe we've been there for awhile but the reality of it is sinking in). I think part of me still thinks I'm 21 but now everyone is getting married, having babies, etc and I feel that I'm closer to 31 than 21. And I haven't done a friend vacation in a really long time. I just think a big group on the beach or going to some new location to explore sounds amazing. Now I just need to win the lottery.

But hey - I can start to plan now and worry about saving later!

Week 21 of the 52 Week Challenge

Sorry - very late with this post. I've been feeling stressed and a bit burned out lately. I could really go for a nice spa day - a facial, massage, some relaxing water with limes, a hair cut.... ahhh (oh and a vacay to somewhere tropical). I can tell I'm stressed: I forget things, I start snapping at people, I retreat a bit - reading more, spending time alone, my face breaks out like an angry 14 year old and my energy wanes. I felt pretty good this long weekend - I wanted to relax - no plans - nothing. I went to the gym three times for 45 minutes to an hour each time. My legs ached in a good way, my blisters in a bad way. So now I need new running shoes and to lose a few pounds before I have to prance around in a bikini I'll be doing good.

So this week's challenge... it's going to have to be something quick (since I didn't post on Sunday) and something relaxing (since I obviously need a break). Let's go with try meditating. I know you could say it's stupid but I did find when I was doing yoga a couple times a week things seemed to slip away more. I find myself stuck between an extrovert and an introvert in real life - my mood changing with the scenario and the introvert in me benefited greatly from all the meditation. So this week - take sometime to be alone and be quiet. Or if you're more relaxed dancing in a club with pounding music and lots of people do that. Both are probably beneficial in their own ways. As for me I've already decided to play hooky tomorrow from work. There's something so delicious about being off randomly in the middle of the work while everyone else is slaving away. I'm really looking forward to it.

A Rose By Any Other Name...

Do names matter? I've always been curious about names. I'll Google name meanings, studying the list of popular baby names and because I write bought a baby name book that's not just the meaning of names but what people think when they hear that name.

K and I don't want to have kids yet but I've had a list of baby names going in my head for years. Names float in and out and names I liked at 12 - like Elizabeth - wouldn't make the top 50 now. I gravitate towards names that are unique, not-popular (anything in the top 100 of popular baby names makes me cringe) and slightly old-fashioned (names my great-grandmother and maybe even my grandmother would have loved). I loved Ava for the longest time until Ava cracked the top 10 list and I don't want my future daughter to be Ava X for the rest of her life. I guard my little list with a vengence and am fearful of telling anyone incase they steal my name (ala Rachel in Friends) - I may not need it for ten years but I want it there just in case.

This brings me to my point - I will read any story that talks about names. And today, CNN had a story asking "Does your name shape your destiny?". There are a lot of studies that say yes. One of the studies they cite talks about how babies with names that start with C or D do worse in schools than their A/B named counterparts. You have the question are the teachers just lazy or is little Colin destined to be worse at math or English than say Abigail. Another study found that women named after states (like Virginia for example) are more likely to move to their namesake. Coincidence? And in Freakonomics, the authors discuss naming - everything from what a child's named to the education level of the mother, to lower income and less educated people naming their child after what the middle class children who in turns parents named them after the upper class children.

So does your name mean anything? Lets take a non-scientific quiz of my own design for a second to prove a point... that at least you name will prejudge you. I'll write the name and you say the first thing you think of. You don't have to share. No one will judge but I bet you think of something for each one.

Tiffany
Amber
Floyd
Sandra
Fabio

Ok the last one was a bit of a joke. I doubt there are many baby Fabio's running around but you did get an image - right?

I like names. I thought of something different for each one in my list. Tiffany's parents are wanna-be's they fall into the same category of parents that name their kids Mercedes, Crystal, etc. Maybe at one point some rich person somewhere decided to name their child after a car but now all I can think of is someone whose trying to hard to be cool. Amber is probably a stripper along with her sisters all named after gem stones. Floyd makes me think of an over-weight older gentleman, probably a bit country. And Sandra is probably a middle aged woman.

To further prove my point that you prejudge someone based on their name. In college Bush was president and his two daughters are Barbara and Jenna. I'm sure they're both very nice girls. A friend and I were talking about it one day and he said something to the effect of if given a choice he would always take the blind date with a Jenna because a Barbara sounds like an unattractive librarian. According to him, Jenna sounded like a hot girl who likes to party. The thing is Jenna could be a plain Jane bookworm and Barbara a hot party animal but before they even walk into the door my friend had already decided who they would be.

So I do think that names mean something. I don't know if they shape your destiny. That if you're parents pick a weird name for you that you're destined to be a loser. But I do think people will judge you based on past experience or stereotypes. What do you think?

And if you're curious - here's a link to the top baby names of 2009. Congrats Jacob and Isabella you're parents love Twilight and there will probably be ten of your friends with the same name.

Get Reading II

I realized that I haven't published one of these posts in forever. Read the first one here. So it's time for my second list of books that I loved.

1. Suzanne's Diary for Nicholas - pure fluff romance at it's best. I think I cried through half this book.

2. Watership Down - maybe because I love rabbits but I love this book about a colony of rabbits - not as boring as you may think.

3. Anna Karenina - I remember having to read this in advanced high school English and loving it. I've actually been thinking I should add it my pile when I need something to re-read.

4. Freakonomics - so insanely interesting. A collection of topics that range from baby names to crime in NYC.

So only 4 this time. I can't give them all up right away. Oh and the book club book is the Forgotten Garden. Of course I'm waiting to the last minute but I'll start it tonight and let you know what I think.

Book Review: The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo - Stieg Larsson

A couple of co-workers were talking about how this book was really good. They sold it as a mystery which immediately made me think - great I won't like this one (I'm not a huge mystery fan). But I looked on Amazon and the reviews were all favorable. I'm going to have to say I didn't really like it. Maybe 2 out of 5 stars.

The book dragged for me. There were endless descriptions of things that didn't really matter. He took practically two pages to describe the interior of a cabin. The whole story seemed convoluted. Was it a murder mystery? A corporate thriller? Was Larsson trying to make a point about how often women are abused? I don't know... the book tried to do too many things. The funny thing is if he had stuck with the murder mystery it would have been good. I liked the parts where Mikael and Lisbeth are trying to unravel what happened to Harriet. It's the rest of the book that bogs it down.

I'm struck by how violent the book is towards women. Lisbeth is raped by her guardian. Harriet is raped by her father and her brother. And SPOILER: The Vanger family has a history of murdering and ill-treating women. If I'm reading this book correctly, then half of the women in Sweden have been abused at some point. Doesn't exactly read as a tourist advertisement for a Swedish vacation. The thing is - I felt like some of the mistreatment was gratuitous... there for the reaction or the shock value. Larsson goes into detail of Lisbeth's rape and the aftermath yet in the end the rape has little to do with the plot of the story other then to illustrate the fact that Lisbeth feels cut off from "normal" society. Maybe I'm not into mystery's because of the violence but within moderation and when it enhances the basic plot I wouldn't be gasping and making a point of it in my review. The violence in the book was over the top and I felt like often only used for shock value and not to help the plot.

Speaking of more unnecessary parts of the book - Mikael basically sleeps with any and every main character in the book if it happens to be female. There's absolutely no point. I don't feel like he's in love with any of them. I don't even really like Mikael or his one sex partner - Erika because Erika is married and her husband finds it acceptable that every now and then she and Mikael still have sex - what??? Really? And honestly, none of his sexual escapades again have anything to do with the plot other than to tie up another 50 pages of nonsense.

The corporate thriller part of the book dragged for me. The bad guy (I can't remember his name because all the names are Swedish) is obviously dirty. You learn pretty early on there is a spy working for Mikael. And really you can assume from the beginning that if given the chance Mikael will take bad guy down (sorry - I'm too lazy to look up his twenty character Swedish name).

Apparently there are two more books in the series. I already have the second one - had placed it on hold before I read this one. I'm not sure I'm going to read it. I'm not sure who to recommend this book too - maybe if you like mystery's but the mystery in my opinion is just okay. There's really no satisfying reason as to why the guilty party or parties were committing the murders (SPOILER) other than the fact that they were sociopaths who got off on that sort of thing. I feel like it was a bad six part episode of CSI where at the end you find out the killer was the lady next door and she did it because she was bored. Lame.

Note of warning - aside from the graphic rape scenes. The book is written in Swedish and translated to English. Meaning - it reads like a book that wasn't written in English, and you have to try to struggle through a lot of place names and character names that are Swedish. The author gives you a family tree in the beginning of the book but a map of Sweden would be helpful. I never knew whether Mikael was going down the block or four hours away.

So no, I'm not going to rave about how great this book is despite the many reviews saying they think it is great. I feel like it's one of those books that people read and after struggling through you sit back and think that's interesting and then immediately toss it out in the yard sale bin but brag to all your friends you read it because it happened to make some best-seller book club pick somewhere. Have you read it? What did you think?

Week 20 of the 52 Week Challenge

So how did we all do with the fruits and veggies? I'm not sure I got exactly the right amounts each day but I was more aware and tried to eat more fruits and veggies so that counts. I'm hoping I can keep it up. I really need to get my butt in gear and get to the gym if I want to lose a few lbs before bikini season is here (I mean is it really next weekend - yikes!). I will say keeping with the get healthy theme - I've been reading lots of magazine articles about how great all these fruits and veggies are for you. One was bragging about watermelons so I had to go out and scoop up one of those - super yummy! I'm sad strawberry season is pretty much over - what was that one week?? - but I'm going to be on the look out for other good summer foods.

Anyway... onward to week 20... a new challenge that I need to make up and try my hardest to follow. This week - well I'm already feeling a bit burned out and I feel amazingly (good in a way) that my days are fast filling up through July. I was going to pick a hard challenge this week but we'll hold it for a week that I feel more inspired. And we'll go with no junk food. 7 days of zero junk - no candy, no cookies, no chips. Yikes. I was really enjoying my hummus on whole wheat chips (I might have to slide a bit on that one... I mean whole grain is healthy right??).

I think I'm good on the sweets front. I'm not much of a sweets girl. I can easily say no to ice cream and cake but that big bowl of Fritos might be chanting my name. That being said... since I'm big on moderation - I'm going to say I can have one day to cheat if I need to. Need to meaning bad day at work that is only solved by scarfing down a handful of chips and hummus. haha love that my go to bad food is semi healthy. So anyway... get to eating healthy and keep me posted on how you're doing!

Book Review: Sweet Little Lies Lauren Conrad

Why did I read this book? Hmmm I kind of have to ask myself the same question because I wasn't a huge fan of the first one. The writing was mediocre, the plot just ok and honestly I spent more time trying to figure out who was who and hoping for some great Hills dish than getting into the story. But still, when Sweet Little Lies popped up at my library I figured what the heck at least this time I wouldn't have to buy it (LA Candy never made it to the library).

Thoughts... if I'm being generous three out of five stars. Probably leaning more towards 2 1/2. It's not horrible but it's not by any means great. It got four out of five stars on Amazon and frankly I think the only reason it did was a bunch of teenagers or Conrad's friends went in and ranked it a five so the honest reviewers didn't stand a chance.

The plot is ok. The book picks up where LA Candy leaves off. Lauren... I mean Jane (yawn what a boring name ... all you authors out there this is the time you can really go for it on names don't go with Jane...augh)... anyway... Jane is in Cabo with Madison (who clearly is supposed to be some form of Heidi) after photos of Jane cheating on her boyfriend were leaked to the press. Jane has gone from the good girl to this tabloid sensation. Apparently, she gets all this press about her hooking up with Braden (I hope I spelled that right). First... I don't know - I know Lauren was big in her prime on the Hills but seriously a ton of covers? Maybe the not so classy mags but I doubt People or Entertainment Weekly is rushing to publish a story about a reality TV star cheating. And two, even if they did publish it, it's going to be in the back or the very front like a two second blurb - not a cover and maybe only one week not week after week like this nonsense dragged on. (Don't get me wrong I liked the Hills and think Lauren is great but I just doubt her character's ability to land so many covers...). Scarlett is trying to convince Jane that Madison leaked the photos and is a huge bitch. Gaby (another girl in the story) is just there to fill space, as is a girl at Lauren's work who is memorable enough that I forgot her name.

Basically, all you learn about The Hills - is gasp the producer tell them what to talk about. Wow. Come on Lauren, I'm guessing a good percentage of the people reading this book are doing it to get some gossip and that's all you're going to give us?

Problems I see with the story:

1. Jane gets back together with Jesse even though there is no reason she should. Jesse acts like a jerk and she stays with him for 2/3 of the book. I felt like there was no reason why she would stay with him, even if for some reason she decides to get back together with him.

2. She tries desperately to make Madison likable but I think fails miserably. And honestly why is Madison targeting Jane - so she can be a star? I don't know. Madison is a little too one dimensional for me. She's not likable because I don't care about her. I have no reason to feel like she is remotely justified in what she does to Jane.

3. All the characters aren't very likable. Jane is ok - she's the main character you're supposed to like her but like you sometimes feel watching Lauren on The Hills - she's the nice girl that's just there. The action happens around her and sometimes too her but what's she really like. I will say though Lauren has a certain charisma (I stopped watching after she left) that doesn't come across with Jane. You root for Lauren because you want her to succeed - she's the every girl in her early twenties (just with better clothes and more money), clubbing, trying to find a job, trying to find love, friend drama, etc.

I think the book is filler to get to book 3 (sort of how I felt with Twilight - only I felt like books 2, 3, and 4 were filler and could have been summed up in 1 but that's a different topic). This one leaves off with a cliffhanger - will Jane continue on LA Candy, will Madison be the star, will she chose her high school boyfriend or Braden or someone new... cue dramatic music.

So... in conclusion, it's a good beach read. It took me maybe a day to breeze through. But it wouldn't be my first choice read.

Week 19 of the 52 Week Challenge

So still part of my get a bit more healthier... and perhaps Britney abs (circa 2000) for the summer... this week's goal - eat more fruits and veggies. More... being?? Well apparently the food pyramid is no longer one size fits all - thank God because I was never going to be able to eat like 10 cups of fruit a day - ridiculous! So you have to go over to www.mypyramid.gov and click on My Pyramid Plan. You fill out like maybe four questions and then it spits out your own personal chart. Pretty nifty if you ask me! So mine says 3 cups veggies and 2 cups fruits. I love fruits a lot more than veggies and honestly I was hoping this goal could just be I eat the 5lbs of strawberries I picked on Saturday. But alas I need more vegetables.

So Sunday I was probably ok - I had mixed veggies with dinner and a piece of corn. Lunch I had leftovers from Sticky Rice which was mainly carrots and snow peas... so maybe 2 cups?? 1 1/2 cups that day. Fruits - does eating your body weight in strawberries count? Easily 2 cups.

Today... Veggies - I'm going to say tomato sauce and more leftover Sticky Rice counts so I'm probably at 1 cup if I'm lucky. Fruits - again a round the clock diet of strawberries (even my yogurt was strawberry flavored).

So it's def. a challenge.

One note on The Pyramid - maybe you guys are better than me but I have no clue what 7 ounces of grains are - seriously can't they just say you can have 2 slices of bread or 1 cup of pasta. I don't have a scale and I'm not about to get all anal and weigh every piece of food that goes into my mouth. More people would get healthy if it was easier to understand all this nonsense.

Book Review: House Rules: A Novel

I started reading Jodi Picoult with My Sister's Keeper. It took some very difficult topics (what obligation do you have to your family, is it ethical to have another child to save your first child, etc) and made them compelling and easy to read. It was an emotional roller-coaster. I quickly read pretty much every other book she ever wrote. I came to the realization that My Sister's Keeper - while still a great book - follows a strict Picoult formula and House Rules is no exception.

Rule 1: Emotionally charged topic with lots of grey area (things can't be black and white - that would make it too easy).

Rule 2: The story told from multiple viewpoints.

Rule 3: Surprise endings.

Rule 4: Make you think but not too hard.

Rule 5: Stressed but very attractive women who will usually sleep with someone that is at least mildly inappropriate.

Those would be the basics. Rule 5 may or may not happen but I've noticed it in a few of her books and if the woman doesn't sleep with said person she will be described by multiple people as being strikingly pretty. And really this has not much to do with the plot except for the fact there are few books (or movies, or TV shows) about incredibly not-good looking people.

How do I feel about House Rules? Let's start with 3 out of 5 stars. If you've never read Picoult before then you'd probably go with 4. I think it was average. I don't hate it but it followed a formula and pretty quickly you could guess where it was going. I'm glad I didn't buy it - I wouldn't read it again (Shout-out Library!).

The story follows Jacob, a teen diagnosed with Asperger's, his family and others that are dragged into the murder case of Jacob's social skills tutor. Jacob is a strange character - on one hand you feel bad for him because he is so socially awkward but on the other (and I'll admit I don't know much about Asperger's) he's cold, awkward and surprisingly functioning for someone who has panic attacks when paper gets crumpled. His brother Theo - another character - doesn't have Asperger's but he's living with the affects it has on his family because of Jacob. Theo is breaking into houses, stealing minor things, he doesn't fit in, etc. The thing is I felt bad for Theo but I didn't feel like he was developed quite enough for me to care too much about him. Emma - is the mom, she's gorgeous, stressed, poor. Then the other two narrators are Oliver (Jacob's lawyer) and Rich (a police officer who arrests Jacob). For me, the characters in this book weren't as well developed as some of the others. I wasn't drawn to them in the same way as I have been with her other books and like Jacob with his Asperger's - socially the characters all seem awkward (the point perhaps?).

I always read the reviews on Amazon when I decide to get a book. Yeah, sometimes the people are dead wrong but a lot of times they are pretty accurate. A lot of the people were complaining the story just ended without any resolution to the case. Well, one I think it's pretty easy to figure out early on what happened to the social skills tutor. And the case, I felt like it was all just background for the family to all come together. And honestly, I cared about Jacob but at the same time he didn't think through his actions, didn't explain what happened to anyone, and so you can't feel that bad (ok maybe because of his Asperger's because no one asked him to explain, he didn't... I don't know if I buy that). And the non-ending is pretty typical Picoult. It's basically what do you think happened? Was Theo arrested? Did Jacob get convicted? Etc...

Have you read it? What do you think? My next book is Sweet Little Lies by Lauren Conrad - I'll let you know if I like it, the first one didn't blow me away so I'm not having high hopes.

Packing Quiz

K's mom sent me this today and since it was short and I thought it could be fun - I did it. Here's the link http://www.independenttraveler.com/packing-quiz/. It's a packing quiz - what's your packing style?

My results:

You Are a Systematic Suitcase Stuffer
Your motto: always be prepared. You probably write long lists of everything that could come in handy on the road, and you add more and more items to the list as your departure date nears. You have rarely, if ever, forgotten to pack something important -- in fact, your travel companions regularly ask to borrow things that they've forgotten to pack. But you also tend to carry a fat, weighty suitcase and you may have been subjected to extra checked-bag fees while flying.

Your tendency to plan ahead is a great packing strategy. Learn to lighten your load in order to save money on baggage fees (and save room for some souvenirs!).

It's probably a little accurate... or a lot. My packing strategy is to take everything I own "just in case". What did you get?

Week 18 of the 52 Week Challenge

Since summer is around the corner and with that brings bathing suits... my next few challenges are about getting healthy. I did some research early this weekend and can't find an exact amount of water that you need a day - does anyone know? It appears that some people think enough to replenish what you lose, other says 8 oz 8 times a day and then there was a third site that was saying it depends on the person. Since the 8 x 8 is the rule I've heard most often - I'm going with that. This week - we'll even start Monday - the challenge is to drink 8 oz of water 8 times a day.

I already have my favorite water bottle ready. It's 26 oz so to make it easy on myself (if my math is right) I need to drink to drink 3 whole bottles of water from it a day. Not too bad - right now I typically go through 2 full bottles a day... I'll just increase my trips to the water fountain by one.

Good luck!

Race for a Cure

Remember this week was to get outside... I try to take C for a walk fairly regularly and I wanted to step it up. I read outside. Today, we weeded our flower beds and planted some new additions (tired!). And yesterday, I had signed up to run in the Susan G. Komen 5K. Work had sent out an email asking for participants. Typically I ignore these volunteer things... I'm not sure why. I guess because its always a bit easier to do what I want and not give up my precious free time. But this time I really debated about it. I sent it to my mom - did she want to run with me - my dad said he would walk it. So I signed us up for the non-competitive 5k.

We had to be there at 7am. I was not looking forward to an early start (I got up fifteen minutes before my dad was picking me up). The first hour was a lot of just standing around. Then we went to the race starting point, they had an announcer, vendors, music. It was different. It was emotional. It was fun. I actually felt like this could really make a difference. I can't put into words how great I felt afterwards.

Things I learned:

- 1 in 8 women will have breast cancer.

- If caught early I think they said the survival rate is 98% (that's amazing!).

- This all started with Susan Komen's sister who vowed to do everything she could to fight for a cure. What an amazing sister! The organization is now worldwide.

- On a less serious note, I need better running shoes or thicker socks - both my heels have massive blisters (we're talking swollen and the size of quarters - flip flops for the next week for me).

Before the race we all milled around, we decided not to pick up any of the giveaways until after so we didn't have to hold them. They did a survivor parade. Then they told us to go line up. We didn't do the competive timed part so we were near the middle of the pack. When we got up hill and turned the corner to head down across a bridge, it was so cool to just look out and see a sea of people in front of us and behind us. And for something so emotionally charged (people had on their shirts who they were racing for - in celebration of or in memory of) there was so much life happening. People were laughing, talking, kids running around, music playing, people cheering us on, and the shirts and costumes some people wore were hysterical.

I would do it again in a heart beat.

Here's the song that kicked off the race. Enjoy.



For some reason YouTube doesn't show up for me so if it doesn't embed right (let me know) and the link is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEZHISEL4lk

Rompers II

So I went to The Limited last night - I had to get a Mother's day gift and to try on a romper. They totally reminded me why I love that store. I figured out what's wrong with the other rompers I've seen and tried on. Most are one pieces with no zippers or buttons or buttons only at the top near your chest. The piece is meant to be pulled on up over your hips and then slipped over your shoulders if there are straps. Meaning it has to be big enough to get over your hips (which I don't know about you but are the widest part of my body). So in the end you get what's the equivalent of a sack.

So I went in and picked up the turquoise one. They had sold out of the one shoulder one!!! I tried on a large which was way too big but I wanted to see if it was even halfway cute. I'm in love. The turquoise I tried on a small. There was a zipper on the shorts and buttons up each side of the top - allowing the fabric to open enough to slide over your hips and butt. The turquoise one is super cute on - I still had a butt. haha.... the only thing I'm not crazy about on that one is that it hits pretty high on my chest (much higher than on the model). So I didn't buy either one but I'm going to order the black one later and will give you a final assessment then.

But my tip if you are going to dare a romper - pay more and get one with sides that can be unzipped or unbuttoned - the extra give will allow the piece to still be form fitting once closed.

Happy Shopping!

My Favorite Things - The Limited

Was this a secret? If so, poorly kept. Especially if the sales people recognize you when you walk in and point you to the new stuff. Since I'm trying to be good and not spend money (see post re. new computer) I haven't been in forever but The Limited is torturing me with $15 coupons and emails about their newest clothes. I swear I think it's all a trick to get me back in the store (obviously).


Anyway, a while back I talked about wanting a romper. I've been pretty discouraged because most said rompers are a. hard to find (this isn't exactly CA or NY) b. incredibly unflattering (i.e. gives you no butt or diaper butt) or c. don't fit properly (diaper butt/no butt excluded, I've found the bottoms are tight, the tops too big, etc....). But guess what popped into my inbox a few days ago....















A turquoise romper (which is what I wanted) at my favorite store ever!!! For half a second I debated calling in sick to get to the mall but that would be just silly... right? Well anyway, they have three options... turquoise above for $69.50.














This option which I love - how cute is the one shoulder look? It's $79.50 (a little steep I think).
















And this... not sure what to think.... I don't know I'm not so much a fan but I might try it on. You can never tell in photos. This one is $69.50.


So I'm going this weekend even if I have to sneak over there and hide the package in my car for a month... or maybe I can tell K The Limited had a special buy one get one free deal??? I'll admit all the prices are a little high for what's really shorts but I do have the $15 coupon, plus a few others floating around that will help. And really - these things might not even fit right!



Anyway, what do you think? Would you wear a romper?

Week 17 of the 52 Week Challenge

These are getting harder to come up with so any feedback or help let me know... because hello 52 resolutions no matter how big or small is a challenge to even think up much less do. So the savings thing - I totally forgot to change my automatic deductions (I know - bad)... but I'm going to go in and do it now - I haven't been in a real computer mood recently. It's too nice out.

So this week the challenge... drum roll.... get outside. Enjoy all this nice pre-summer weather. Take the puppy for a walk, go to a festival, sit and enjoy a glass of wine on the deck... all the perks of summer before it's full on too hot to do anything but lay in front of the AC. Enjoy!

Inside a Make-Up Junkies Bag I

This is a new topic for me which I'm going to try and see how long it lasts. With summer fast approaching (if not already here) in the South, I'm changing my beauty routine a bit. It sounds strange at first but I tend to wear powder (mineral) foundation in the winter and tinted moisturizer in the summer. You would think my skin would want the extra moisture in the winter but I have to rave that Bare Minerals looks completely natural without the cakey-effect that I feel like some foundations leave. And you already know I swear by Eucerin face lotion.


Anyway, I switch to tinted moisturizer in the summer for one reason - it's easier. Who wants to put on a bunch of make-up when it's three hundred degrees in the shade? Winter is the time for the arsenol of beauty products - concealer, foundation, bronzer, powder. Summer is the time for quick and easy. My one true love in tinted moisturizer comes from Estee Lauder. It's called Day Wear Plus Multi-Protection Tinted Moisturizer SPF 15 - I get light medium 02. I actually wear it with the Eucerin because short of the product getting discontinued I'm not giving that up and I don't feel like my face gets too greasy. That being said my skin tends to crave moisture so unless you have super dry skin I would try it alone first and see how your skin does.

I can't say enough about this product. Clinique used to make a tinted moisturizer and I had used that forever until it got discontinued - but Clinique's loss is Estee Lauder's gain because I would not switch back and it has opened the door to my trying out more of their products.

I wear this instead of foundation. Dab a bit of concealer around your eyes if you need it. Throw on some blush or bronzer and mascara and you're set. You can even wear it to the pool or the beach and get a tiny bit of cover-up without looking like you're wearing a full on mask. The price isn't horrible - $36 range - about the same as regular foundation at the department store and it last forever. You only need a dime size amount.

What's in your summer beauty bag?

Week 16 of the 52 Week Challenge

This week is a little bit harder - because we can't have them all easy or where's the challenge? My computer is a dinosaur - in computer years it should have been extinct about three years ago. Nothing is wrong with it per say except the monitor died last week and its incredibly slow. I had to turn it off today for a storm and I just waited fifteen minutes for it to boot up and load Internet Explorer so I could write this blog. Yawn. I almost gave up. Anyway, K and I decided to bite the bullet and let my cousin pick out a new computer for us - its supposed to be coming this week - yay! Of course computers are crazy expensive and I never know what to get. I feel like its one of the most confusing purchases ever - what's good, what's bad... and everyone has different opinions. Anyway, K and I are splitting the costs and for my half I'm going to use the money I was going to put towards Bride's wedding but since she kicked me out.... well..... money is now going towards the computer and it will actually make my life easier. However, I still need to kick in extra money to cover my half, not to mention K is paying me back in installments, so.... my already tight budget just got tighter. That brings me to this week's challenge.... Save more.

What? How can you save more when there is barely anything to save to begin with? Remember back a few weeks ago, we made a budget (or we were supposed to make budgets)... well now, try to cut something. I don't care if it's $5 you would have spent on lunch or coffee. You have to start somewhere. I'm going to increase my automatic deductions by $10.

Let's talk automatic deductions - I love them. It takes the guess work out of savings. I don't have to remember to transfer money or squirrel it away under my bed.... just kidding - that's not safe and you're not earning any interest! I set up my accounts to take money out as soon as my paycheck is deposited - it's like it was never even there! So, before Sunday, I need to go in and increase the amount. Tough - I know - but I figure I can eat lunch at my desk one more day a month and cover the additional money. Plus, I can't stress enough how important it is to save for down the road.... which could be retirement, a vacation... or yes, even a new computer.

Good luck!

Books: Romance

This is kind of a review, kind of a favorite thing post. I'm going to admit that I like romance novels. I'm not talking Nicholas Sparks romance, I'm talking the books with the embarrassing covers of muscular men and beautiful damsels in distress. There is something so deliciously forbidden about them - obviously you can't cart that novel off to the gym. Yet at the same time I love slipping into that world - where ladies are elegant in fancy clothes, and men are a little rough and tumble.

I recently read pretty much every book by Deeanne Gist (a Christian romance writer for all those faint at heart) and Sabrina Jeffries.

I received the Jeffries book for free last year from a book festival and took it home laughing that I might read it if I was bored. Well, boredom came and I grabbed the book - I can't remember the title but its from The School of Heiresses series - and I loved it. It was well-written (i.e. not just about bodice ripping encounters with fluffy dialogue as filler) and really captured my attention with the story. Sure romance stories are always a little far fetched - beautiful intelligent women falling for men that don't always seem to be the best match - but Jeffries make it so easy to fall into their character's world. I went to the library and quickly scooped up every Heiress book I could find. Sure some are better than others - that's the way of novels - but all of them are interesting stories with a little bit of sex. I can't even pick a favorite. I did join her fan club so I get random emails and I bought her latest book The Truth About Lord Stoneville - I'll have to let you know if it's any good.

Gist is different - I read one of her books a few years ago - A Bride Most Begrudging - I actually picked it up thinking it was just a regular piece of fiction - not realizing it was romance or Christian romance at that. I was reluctant to read it thinking it would be all scripture and Bible study - but its not. Obviously, she works that into the story but most of the time it doesn't seem forced. The only two books of hers I wasn't really into were Deep in the Heart of Trouble and Courting Trouble a series about Ellie. Ellie just isn't that likable to me - its not because she has premarital sex (gasp - apparently this has gotten Gist a lot of flack on Amazon) - but I don't care about her. She's ahead of her time (the book takes place in the late 1800's) - she believes in women's right, loves biking, helps run a company but can't find a husband. The stories were just ok - Ellie spends way too much time harping on the fact she gave her virginity to a scoundrel and now she's not pure and no man will want her (not to mention she's decided she's going to be married to God).

Do you read romance novels? Are you too embarrassed to admit it if you do? I'm almost tempted to pick one for Book Club just for fun of course.

Christian the lion

Week 16 of the 52 Week Challenge

I know I need to get better about actually posting on Sunday. A lot has been going on recently and I haven't felt the desire to keep a running log of it. Extra stress makes me collapse into a really good book and I hope to poke my head out once it's all over. So this week the challenge is to stop and smell the roses. I get this idea because my Real Simple from last month was all about time - more time for what you love, less time for the mundane, getting more time, and taking more time. It was a nice reminder that sometimes you just need a break - those precious five minutes where you just breathe in and be thankful that you're alive.

This is the best YouTube video I've seen in awhile. Check it out - here's the link in case embedding the video (see Christian the Lion post) doesn't work (never shows up on my computer so let me know if you can see it!) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btuxO-C2IzE

A Lesson In Being Nice

I thought I was doing really great this week with this whole be extra nice to others thing... I hadn't written any mean emails, I had smiled at strangers... I had basically done a whole lot of not going out of my way to be super nice.

SP is having a cook out tomorrow. I had said I would bring a side dish. Since my computer died on Tuesday (lovely... thank God for work laptops) and I'm hoping to track my computer expert cousin down tomorrow morning I had to go to Kroger today. A part of me loves grocery shopping - just pushing the cart up and down every aisle and imagining all the yummy things I could make - the other part of me hates it and wants to get out of there as fast as I can.

The check-out people are always nice - asking how your day is, sometimes complimenting you on something, etc. But as I was leaving the man that packed all my groceries in my bag stopped what he was doing and said "do you have small kids at home" and he held out a lollipop. I smiled and said "no I'm sorry." Although why I apologized I'm not sure. He handed me the lollipop and still smiling said "that's ok, have a sucker anyway, it's Friday." I had replied that I hoped he had a great weekend. He told me his name and said to let him know if there was anything in the store he could ever help with and to have a blessed weekend, too.

It really made my day. It was so simple. And yet he didn't have to do that. He could have just said have a great weekend or hi... but this simple two minute if that exchange left me feeling happy. It actually even made me want to go grocery shopping there more often (shout-out Kroger)... And it made me think, how simple things like giving someone a lollipop is all you really need to do to step out of your box and be a little bit extra nice.

The thing that struck me is to do his job all he had to do was say hi and have a good day. He didn't have to give out lollipops (they don't say Kroger on them), he didn't have to offer help next time I was in the store. He simply had to do his job and smile occasionally. But he did more than that and that is what makes a difference. I hope that in my last two days of this challenge I can make a difference. That I can take that extra step to make someone else smile and maybe influence them to do something nice in exchange for nothing in return.

Week 15 of the 52 Week Challenge

I forgot to do this Sunday and with all the drama yesterday I didn't do it then either... so this week is appropriate I think and pretty easy. Be nicer.

Nice always gets a bad rap. You're looked at being the girl (or guy) that gets walked all over. Or maybe the second choice as in, girls may date the bad guys but they marry the nice ones. But we could all stand to be a little nicer. My mom always used to say to us growing up - if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all.

So this week, or what's left of it, I'm going to try to be nicer. Which means I won't type back an angry email to Maid (see previous post). I won't scream nastiness (even if it's just in my car) to the bad driver in front of me. And I'll try not to say anything unless I have something nice to say. This does not mean I'm going to let myself be walked all over and there are sometimes when you just have to stand up for yourself - but if that happens - I'll say it all as nicely as possible.

Oh and as for Maid, I did a trick that helps me vent, I typed up an email of all the bad and not so bad things I would say to her - starting with I want an apology for your rude and uncalled for behavior and I hit delete. Tip - if you are going to do said email to someone you know - don't actually type their email address in the to field. You may accidentally hit send and regret it later.

Going to the chapel and going to get married… but first… it’s all about the bride…zilla.

I try not to write about things happening in my life for fear that someone somewhere might get offended but today… well, I think it could be something everyone could relate to. Monday was going as planned until a friend of mine (let’s call her Bride) shot a group email out to her bridesmaids basically accusing us of not being her friends because we weren’t interested in planning or paying for parties for her. She then proceeded to kick us all out of the wedding while praising another bridesmaid (let’s call her Maid) for being the only one that cared. I was pretty much in shock.

Let’s rewind a bit…. A few months back I had sent an email to all of Bride’s bridesmaids and said hey – can’t wait to meet you… typical pre-wedding chatter, what are some of your ideas for the shower and bachelorette party. Maid responded with an email about trips to places like Vegas or Key West. Myself and a few other bridesmaids were a little taken aback. We were all for a fun girl’s weekend but the airfare and hotel for those types of places would kill us. I talked to Bride and she seemed shocked that Maid would write that to everyone and assured me she was fine with a beach trip somewhere more local or a night out on the town, etc. I wrote Maid back and she promised to look into other ideas and let us all know. Now at this point, to be fair, I probably could have offered to do the research or followed up with her, but she’s a big girl, I figured she would get back to us and I also felt like if she wanted help, she would let us know. So I dropped the issue. Bride’s wedding was a few months off.

So that brings us up to today. I get the email at 830 and like any friend (who can’t just call because of working in a cube), I swallowed my anger and typed back a respond all that I was sorry she felt that way, respected her decision but my budget would not allow me to go on crazy getaways but if she wanted to do something smaller we could do that and I was still planning on doing the shower, etc. A few minutes later, Maid responds that we don’t need to worry about it. She and Bride are going away together somewhere secret. Basically accuses us of being lazy bridesmaids that didn’t want to do anything other than go out in Richmond or VA Beach and puts everyone on blasts implying she’s the better friend and if we didn’t have the money we never should have agreed to be in the wedding. I’m sorry when did this become a bridesmaid competition? I swallow all the bile I want to type back at Maid – including where to shove her trip. And wait for Bride to respond. Which eventually she does… the thing is she never apologizes for the first email, or her rogue Maid’s email, her apology if we want to call it that was for the fact that we were bombarded with emails. And so this all leads me to the topic….

What is acceptable to expect of your wedding party?

Now we can go look at etiquette books about who does what, who pays what, etc. But let’s talk real world for a minute. I’ve been in two weddings, three if I count my own. And what is assigned by rules or etiquette to certain people and what actually happens are two different things. In my wedding, my mom and sister (matron of honor) threw my shower and no offense to my sister but it was at my mom’s so I’m assuming she took on the brunt of the work and costs. My bachelorette party was coordinated by all my maid’s but we stayed in my house, went out local, and instead of a limo (I had said it was too expensive) my pregnant sister drove us around in her jeep. But it was fine. It was more about being with my girls, hanging out, laughing, drinking, dancing… having fun. K – who I sent the email to – agreed with my just having fun with friend’s statement. His bachelor party was in NJ at his parent’s beach house but he said he never expected or asked any of the guys to pay for anything (of course with guy’s there is never even half the drama as with the ladies). It wasn’t a crazy Hangover style trip. My other wedding experiences – pretty similar. It wasn’t about what you could pay/give to the happy couple – it was about hanging out. My friend J in NJ her bachelorette party was dinner out with the girls and her shower – I couldn’t even make it because I had to drive home that day. And the thing I remember most about J’s wedding was she was always concerned with how much we had to spend. She let us pick the bridesmaid’s dress that we wanted and I selected a floor-length halter. When the David’s Bridal girl announced the price (I can’t remember now how much but I’m thinking $250 to $300) she kept asking if that was ok, did I want to look for something else, etc. Now we can’t all have as easy going of friend’s as J – although I wish!


My idea, and I could be off, for a wedding, is for the bride to take into account who her friend’s are before she sets her expectations for the pre-wedding celebrations (and even for that day). If you’re Jennifer Anniston and all your friends are multi-millionaires then yeah a week in Paris and designer bridesmaid’s dresses isn’t a big deal. If you’re an average Jane Smith and you’re friends are in their mid-late twenties with average jobs then maybe you need to scale back your expectations.

Your bridesmaids are your bridesmaids – they are there for you that day, to help with minor wedding planning, to help plan pre-wedding festivities, etc. they are not your servants or your punching bags. It’s simply not acceptable to turn all bridezilla on them and force them to cut their hair, get fake tans, lose weight, etc (I know this happens – I’ve seen the show Bridezillas and what those people put their so-called friends through is ridiculous).

Bridesmaids are expected to buy a dress that they will never wear again but said dress should be somewhat reasonable in costs. My experience is the dress is typically going to run with alterations right at or under $500. Bridesmaids are also expected to plan some sort of shower (although in my experience the mom’s and family typically help), some sort of bachelorette party, buy shoes for that day, although not a requirement hair and/or make-up for that day is usually expected. In addition, to any gifts, photos, etc.

And if the bride has a problem with a friend's behavior, pick up the phone. You liked them enough to ask them to be in your wedding so you should have the balls to call them when you have an issue. It's all about communication and I'm a firm believer that emails and IMs (and yes, blog posts) don't always do justice to what can be said face to face. You're much more willing to write things that you wouldn't dream of saying to someone's face and your words can be misread as being nastier than you meant.

Am I missing anything on expectations? What has your wedding experience been? Am I out of line on the trip?

As for the situation above... Maid, I've debated sending her a nasty-gram back but that serves no purpose and as S said - take the high road on this one. Lets just say if I ever do meet her I'm not planning to be BFF's and a cold shoulder might be in order. And as for Bride, I'm not sure what I want to do. I know weddings are stressful times and all the planning can make even the most level-headed bride crack every now and then but at the same time I feel attacked by Bride and Maid and an apology is in order. I've asked Bride to meet me for coffee to talk but as of yet she's refused and I've got a meeting in a bit so I can't call her tonight.

So today's lesson - brides be nice to your bridesmaids - at one point you were friends. And everyone out there, don't send nasty-gram emails in the heat of the moment because you might regret it later.

Book Club Update

So book club was amazing - we had two new people show up - yay! I always get excited to think how far we've come in a year... just that we're still meeting is a huge accomplishment. So next month is my month - we're a little off because of adding some new members so I get to pick again pretty quickly. So I picked The History of Love... As always read along if you like and let me know what you think.

Do You Want Fries With That Shake?

I get a little fired up about people not taking responsibility for their actions. Hey, be a man (or a lady) and fess up to your actions. Case in point, CNN had a story today about has the fast food industry gone too far? Basically, so you don’t have to read it the story talks about all these really fattening foods that fast food places have come out with. KFC being the most recent offender with a bunless sandwich which is two slices of fried chicken, cheese and bacon. Needless to say the thing is loaded with calories and fat. But hello, did anyone think eating fast food was good for them? I didn’t think so. You know eating fast food is bad for you and we do it anyways and then when we’re fifty pounds overweight we’re whining about how it’s McDonald’s fault… Really? Did Ronald hold a gun to you head and make you eat those French Fries?

It’s not just fast food, our country takes a stance against anything that could be potentially harmful because they think we’re a country of brainless idiots who among other things don’t know that smoking could cause lung cancer (better make sure Big Tobacco can’t advertise that will stop people from smoking), that eating junk will lead to obesity (lets tax fast food restaurants – that will make people think), that drinking excessive amounts of alcohol leads to bad behavior (prohibition anyone?).

Now, don’t get me wrong… I’m all for programs that educate people about the dangers of all these things. Go for it, cram Truth commercials down my throat. Start programs to get people to start exercising. Post food pyramids. And I don’t think people should be eating a ton of empty calorie foods while smoking a pack of cigarettes, drinking a case of beer and driving without a seatbelt… (By the way don’t drink and drive)… BUT if people choose to eat French Fries everyday it’s not my problem that they’re four hundred pounds. And nothing makes me madder than the people who do all those things and then whine about how they’re obese, have lung cancer and liver problems. Really???? Who says the line - you can't fix stupid?

Maybe my problem is I’ve always been the type that can just walk away from food. Sure I crave a good burger sometimes or a glass of wine (no cigs here) but I know that everything is better in moderation. Self control people.

So CNN, in the answer to your question, has the fast food industry gone to far? Probably but is it our place to step in and shake our head at them and say “bad KFC for selling fat” – I don’t think so. Money speaks louder than a bunch of complainers on CNN’s wall jumping up and down about how bad the fast food industry is. KFC can make all the bunless fried chicken sandwiches they want that doesn’t mean you need to rush out there and buy five of them for lunch. If no one buys the junk the company’s won't keep making it. It's all about the dollar and if what they're selling doesn't sell then they'll rethink their business plan.

Maybe we should really be shaking our heads at the parents that think an okay meal is two pieces of fried chicken washed down with a soda. I don’t have kids but I know enough to know that it starts at home. My parents didn’t let us eat junk food, no sugary cereals, limited candy, no soda, limited fast food (like maybe once a month). And you know what? I don’t eat that stuff now. I can’t even tell you the last time I had ice cream in my freezer, I don’t crave sugar like a strung out druggie, I rarely drink soda. I still eat healthy and drink loads of milk like they said. Am I perfect? No. I love Ukrop’s fried chicken like no other. Pizza and take-out Chinese are on my phone's speed dial. But I know I can’t eat it that stuff every day or every week. My parents told me not to smoke or drink. They told me to eat veggies instead of chips. But they also led by example. They practiced what they preached and that’s the biggest lesson of all. Sure you can say kids don’t listen to their parents but I will say some of those lessons stick. And the others, sometimes you have to try things for yourself and figure out that maybe mom and dad were right.

Moderation is key people. I will jump up on my soap box and scream it over and over. You know what’s bad for you and what’s good for you. Make smart decisions. And own up when you make bad ones. It’s not anyone else’s job to moniter and protect you from all the baddies out there. Sometimes you have to put on your big girl panties and think for yourself.